good evening everyone! just to let our readers know, we have a new blogger here! welcome karen! also, instead of my blog being written by “sir dantes” you will see that it is actually being written by me. many of you probably already know that since sir dantes is only three. he doesn’t write yet!

so anyway, a few months ago my place of employment decided to have a team building exercise…a little get together after work to build moral and have a good time. good idea? well depends…

Follow up:

the activity chosen was an evening of bowling, and of course, bring the family. oh! okay, what to do…what to do? if i don’t go then i may be seen as not a team player or anti-social. while i adore my co-workers they may not know that. if i do go, but don’t bring my family i leave my love ones at home possibly saying that well…they aren’t that important. but they are! if i bring the whole family we risk a sensory overload from sir dantes and a potentially embarrassing situation.

so i decided to not commit.

when you have a three year old autistic child you just never know what to expect. he may be aloof and escape into his own little world. or, he may act out and scream and head bang. or, he may be just fine. you just never know. well, you may know with your own child, but sir dantes can handle a particular situation fine several times in a row (like a trip to the grocery store) but that fifth or sixth time something triggers a full blown screaming fit and head banging on the edge of the shopping cart.

eventually though, i had to either commit to going or not. after all, my work needed to know how many were coming for the petty cash count. so, i said we’d come. after all, everyone knows our son is autistic. they knew what could happen, and if the worst did, we would excuse ourselves and go home.

i had to work yesterday, the day of the bowling night. i dreaded going all day. i just knew that sir dantes would go ballistic and everyone would stare at us. my husband was on edge too. i could tell when i came home. he was a little sharp. so, we went through the checklist…a good dinner before we left, clean clothes, fresh diaper…and supplies in case we needed them. sir dantes had not napped and ms. maxie was overly excited. they were both wound up tight. lovely! a completely tense family heading off to go have a fun evening.

luckily sir dantes fell asleep on the way and got a little bit of a nap.

and, things went really well! sir dantes even signed thank you when offered a chip! he did try to run several times. one time he even made it about four lanes down to grab the bowling balls of a couple of bowlers. ms. maxie had a great time and even made a few spares!

one other interesting thing that happened.

while ms. maxie is a social butterfly and will talk to anyone, sir dantes tends to shy away from other children. but, he was really taken by my bosses’ baby. he actually approached her (the baby) and tried to play with her! this is such a great sign of progress. he was sweet and gentle with her; and seemed to really show a “i want to make a friend here” kind of attitude.

overall, a really good night. we still had to leave early because sir dantes started to get a little antsy and hard to handle. plus, we had some friends bringing over some recording equipment. but anyway, it went well. so the moral of this tale?

you have to take your child out there! you have to give them the opportunity to do right socially. don’t let that one bad time that happens out of every four or five keep you in. so what if others stare or don’t understand. you can take those bad times as a chance to educate others.